New Guy

We don't have cubicle walls at work and all sit in pods of four people; all facing each other.  For awhile it's been just us three girls and we all get along really well.  So you can imagine our concern when we heard we would be getting a new member on our team... a new GUY on our team. 

Pod Bestie #1  - I hope he likes to eat and isn't manorexic... (We have a designated spot for treats that consists of cookies, candy, and sugared cereal)

Pod Bestie #2 - He better like the Giants and NOT the Dodgers (We all happen to be from the Bay Area)

Me - ... And hopefully he is on the same cycle as us.

Everyone at once - YA!!!!

 

GOOD LUCK NEW GUY

 

 



Mommy Vaca

The other weekend I had myself a little Mommy Vaca... by this, I mean... the Mr. and the Chitlin went to visit Grandma and Family, while I had to work... leaving me all by my lonesome... PARTY TIME!  Jk... I went out one night, felt old, and spent the rest of my time working, running at sunset, babysitting, spending time with family at my Cousin's adorbs kids' baptism, and missing my Babies.  I think the craziest thing I did was eat ice cream for dinner... oh yea.. that's what I call a vacation. 

Trust me... these pics would have been way more exciting if it was happening about 8 years ago...

Did I say exciting? I meant; me looking drunky accomplishing the art of squinting and winking at the same time.

Pants

Me - "How do you like my new jeans? ...got them from work."

The Mr. - "They look easy."

Oh dear... Someone needs to tell my work how scandalous our denim is.

Problems

In an attempt to overcome our vices...

It was a few days after a week night when the Mr. had a few too many drinkies...

And a second after the FedEx guy dropped off another package and drove away...

The Mr. - Shopping online again?!.

Me  - (After a moment of thought) ...Maybe we should make a deal... I'll quit shopping if you quit drinking

the Mr. - (Pause) You have to stop drinking too.

Me - (Pause) But I shop more than I drink.

the Mr. - You have a problem.

........ it's like the pot calling the kettle black.

Bonding

Being away from my parents and sister has made me talk to them more frequently on the phone.  It bums me out that I miss out on bonding time because we live an 8 hour drive away from each other.  I miss the little things like having dinner together, watching a game, and just going to the movies...  Apparently, I missed out the other day when my Mom and Sister went and watched "Magic Mike" together...

Conversation with Sister Bestie:

Me - So how was the movie?

Sister Bestie - It was ok... I was the youngest person there.

Me - Was it weird watching it with Mom?

Sister Bestie - Kinda... she just was laughing a lot.. and there was that one part of the movie when she turned to me and asked, "What is that?" ... and I had to tell her it was obviously a penis pump.

Me - Awkward...


Conversation with Mom

Me - So how was the movie?

Mom - It was good! I like that Channing Tatum... he's a good looking young man.

Me - Do you think my sister was uncomfortable watching it with you?

Mom - I don't think so... she looked comfortable... she had her feet up on the seats... who puts there feet up in the movie theatre?

Me - Not that kind of uncomfortable.

Mom - (Laughs) I don't know why she would be... your Mother is no prude.

Me - Awkward...

Everyone!

I went to the US Open of Surf today in an effort to embrace my company's culture and the "lifestyle" we represent.  Aka... You are strongly "ENCOURAGED" to go... as in... "You don't HAVE to go but you SHOULD... and by SHOULD we mean get your ass over there.  Anyhoo... I think I would have had a better chance embracing our culture if I was a girl 10 years younger than I am now. But I'm not. And I don't own a time machine. And I can't afford fancy anti aging creams with retinoids or placenta or whatever.... I'm just an overdressed lady in a sea of bikinis.

Sometimes I wish 20 something me would come back and bitch slap cranky old man me.  When did I become the person that suddenly HATES crowded places?... there's too many people and they're all in my way, ...grumble, grumble, grumble...  Why was I complaining that it was too hot outside... No shit, we're at the beach.  Young me started to get irritated with old me... But after a couple of mimosas we all got along.  Mimosas = happiness = mimosas for everyone!